Mommy Letters to Baby!

I love you Already!

Posts tagged mommyhood

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…And then there were 4!

Hi little girl! 

It’s official, you are not a little baby anymore. Daily I am amazed by you. You are so loving! Constantly declaring that every person you meet is your friend. I love that you want to be friends with everybody, but I swear you are a kidnapper’s dream :)

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I wanted to take some time to tell you how special you are to me, to tell you the story of our forever love. I met you on December 31st, 2011 on a cold night in Minnesota and it even snowed a little bit. I remember thinking how perfectly beautiful the night was. 

I loved you way before we met though! From the moment I knew that you existed, EVERYTHING was about you. I literally have lived for you since I discovered I was carrying you. I work harder for you, I love deeper for you, I pray like I have never prayed for all things good for you. 

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The first time I held you in my arms, I cried the ugliest cry ever. It was loud, emotional and mama could barely breathe…I was overwhelmed by you. That you had come from me, that you would love me instantly and that I would get the chance to love you just the same. 

Sometimes, out of nowhere, I still cry the ugly cry for you. I had no idea that I could love you more than I loved you that night, but every day, somehow, I love you even more! 

It’s been me and you and daddy for almost three years and it has truly been special. you have taught us so much and we are so proud to be your parents. 

There is nothing that your deep little voice, or your kisses and hugs can’t fix in our world. Your little spirit is so bright and you radiate so much love, we are forever grateful to God for picking us for you and you for us…

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Things are changing around here. It won’t just be the three of us anymore. Our little family is growing and we will no longer be a trio. Can I be honest? It’s scary, but it’s also exciting. 

It’s been just you for so long and I am sure that it will be hard to adjust to, but just think…All of this love mommy and daddy have for you, how cool will it be to share that with your sister? How amazing will it be to always have someone in your corner who is not mommy or daddy?! 

Just as I loved you instantly, I love your sister already too, but something awesome happened…I became so excited for you to meet her. I think about you having a best friend for life, I think about you being able to tell her secrets that you might not tell us…and I’m ok with that. 

I think about this crazy world and how I would never want you to have to navigate alone. YOU WILL NEVER HAVE TO! You will always have me. You will always have daddy…and you will always have your sister!

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I need you to know that even though you are getting a sister, we will always have a special relationship, I don’t have to take any of the love I have for you away from you to give to your sister. Mommy and Daddys are magic. We can keep producing love without taking it away! 

I have a favor to ask you. Will you help us? When we can’t take care of your baby sister, will you always look out for her? That’s what big sisters do and I think you will be the best big sister ever. 

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Will you protect her and love her so much? It would really mean a lot to mommy and daddy. We are all kind of in this together. The 4 of us, always looking out for each other.

We love hard in this family. I love you and Daddy so much sometimes it hurts. I love your little sister that much already…

You were my first real unconditional love, and you will always be…never forget that…

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But thank you for sharing me…and thank you for being excited for this next adventure!

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A Little Note From Daddy: 

Hey baby girl, 

I wanna start off by saying how much I love every bit of everything about you. I never truly knew the meaning of unconditional love till you came into my life. Even in the times u do things u know u shouldn’t the one thing that remains the same is the love I have for you. I am doing my best to make sure that daddy is someone you’re proud of, someone u can look up to, u can aspire to be like. I want to make sure u never have to ask for anything, make sure u know that all your dreams can come true with some hard work. You’re a very special little girl and will always be. I want u to know that no matter what happens whatever it may be, u can ALWAYS count on daddy. There’s nothing u can’t bring to me, nothing we can’t fix, nothing that will be too big of a problem I can’t help u with. With all of me, I want you to know that I truly, deeply, sincerely, love u! All of you!!
~ Daddy

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Here we go big girl! She’s coming, and just like we did…I KNOW she will love you instantly and you might not even realize it yet, but you definitely love her already too!

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You will be the BEST big sister Ever!image

Love, 

-Mom

Filed under family love maternity siblings babymjletter mumblr babies baby Babygirl black family blacklove pregnancy mommyhood

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Putting It All Into Perspective!

You know those moments that put things into perspective?  Things seems so out of whack, and then bam that moment happens and FINALLY some clarity! That moment was captured in this picture.

Life is not ideal right now.  I do not have a job and the job hunt is much more exhausting than I could have ever imagined.  My baby girl is popping out teeth left and right and she is in so much pain, breaks my heart.  Slimmy has extra stress because, well I am ALWAYS around now and he rarely gets a break from his lady loves-and again I don’t have a job so I am sure that weighs on him as well.

This transition has been interesting, never easy, but always rewarding. Marriage is tough in itself, but a new marriage and a baby right away can make things so beyond chaotic.  We are doing it though, and doing it well too!

Some days I am frustrated with my marriage. We are not always on the same page or in sync and the lack of sleep from being new parents has us pitted against each other at times. 

Some days I am frustrated with myself. I want to be a better wife and mother, I don’t have it all figured out yet. It’s an awful place to want to do more for your family, but your too exhausted to put your thoughts into actions.

Some days being a mom is heartbreaking.  When you are blessed with a kid who literally only cries when she is hungry or needs to be changed, when she cries because she is in pain-it is almost unbearable.

I think a lot, I worry more, I am fully aware of this, but every now and then one of those moments that I was talking about happens and suddenly you can let out a sigh of relief.

When my friend Rebeccah sent over this teaser shot from our family photo shoot, she probably had no idea she was also giving me peace of mind. Despite the fact that my world is in chaos, that shot of my beautiful daughter and husband stopped my whole world and forced me to be thankful.

Thankful that I get to see them smile everyday, thankful that both of their smiles are contagious, so no matter what I am smiling a lot as well. Thankful that me and Slimmy, regardless of issues, stay united as a team and committed to each other and talk often about adding to our family.

Thankful for the past, and the present and extremely hopeful for the future. We are not perfect by any means but imperfectly perfect looks good on us!

Filed under mommyhood baby love family reality check baby girl husband marriage parenthood

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Dear Baby MJ! You Are Such an Awesome Baby

Hi Baby Girl!

WOW! Today you are eight months old and a whole lot of personality. I love you unlike any other love I have ever experienced and I appreciate what your presence has given me-GROWTH.

I want you to know that you are such a happy baby. You rarely cry or fuss! You absolutely LOVE your daddy and FINALLY you and Callie cat seem to really love each other.

The last eight months have flown by. You were this tiny little baby and now you are soooo big and your own person for sure. You love music, you love when your daddy throws you up into the air and you cannot get enough of your Baby Einsteins and Mickey Mouse Club.

Everyone who meets you comments on how well behaved you are! We are very blessed to have you as ours.

I love your giggle and smile and how you love cuddling with me. I want nothing but the best for you and I NEVER make a decision without your well being at the forefront of my mind.

Thank you for being so awesomely you! You’re a mover and a shaker (just like your momma), and you have no interest in crawling but try so hard to walk.

Take your time baby, you are growing so fast and this world has a way of forcing people to grow up far sooner than they should.

I love every part of you and I cannot wait for what the future holds for you! Keep that smile baby! The world can be tough, but you are stronger and you will make it through whatever this world throws at you.

It’s in your blood to be a survivor! It’s in your blood to work hard! and you will ALWAYS feel loved! This I promise you!

Happy eight months baby girl!

Filed under baby mom parenthood babygirl motherhood mommyhood babies parent babymjletter

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Traveling Baby

Baby girl was 3 months old when she hopped on her first flight. I wasn’t off of maternity leave yet but agreed to go cover the top ten finalists of American Idol-working momma for sure. With breastfeeding and her being so young, I thought it would be best to just bring her with.

She is now a world traveler. At only 7 and a half months, she has been to Chicago, New York, Los Angeles on two separate occasions, and to her other home Saint Lucia (The Motherland) twice as well.

I remember the concerned and often judgemental looks I received when people saw me board the plane with a then 3 month old baby. But from day one she has come through like a champ.

I was nervous at first. I didn’t know how she would do, but she’s a happy kid and if she’s not sleeping, she’s playing peek-a-boo with other passengers. I had a lot of people ask me how she would do, looking at her like she was some loose cannon ready to go off at any moment lol. I simply replied, well she hasn’t let me down yet.

She really hasn’t, after our latest trip to The Motherland, I had many passengers tell me that she was the best baby they had ever encountered on a plane. Now I have to give myself some credit as a mommy. Baby girl is teething right now so I assumed the worst. I was worried about her ears, her teeth…I did not want her uncomfortable. I stocked up on baby teethers, baby motrin and I stuck a boob in her mouth on take off and touch down and we soared through with no issues.

I am a working momma and more importantly half of her family lives in a different country. There never really was an option for me, it has been my job since the day she was born to show her the world…it just so happens that in her world there will be many layovers and plane rides included.

Filed under mommyhood motherhood traveling baby teething Babygirl babies

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BOOBS! What’s the BIG Deal?

In honor of national breastfeeding week, I thought I would share some thoughts on breastfeeding. 

Doing what’s best for my baby is my priority despite the ridiculousness I have encountered…I will share some of that with you now.

Since day one I have been very on top of my needs for breastfeeding. I let my employer know what I needed and the company has been fantastic. One particular employee, however, on more than one occasion failed to realize the importance of my pumping schedule and asked me to hurry up and be back by a certain time. HE also told me to pump in a bathroom once.

Let me tell you that my boobs work on their own time, I can’t just tell them to hurry up, it does not work that way. More importantly, how about I prepare your lunch in the bathroom, I bet you might be a little hesitant to eat it…That’s unsanitary so NO I will not make my baby’s lunch in there either.

Once while feeding the baby, I had a guy stare at me the entire time, and YES I was covered up. I finally called to Slim because it was just weird. I’m not sure why he couldn’t look away, nothing was showing and I’m sure it’s no mystery why I have a baby covered up like that.

My own brother recently asked me if I wanted to go into a different room to feed the baby. In his defense, he wasn’t really sure how it worked and was trying to be helpful. I think he was a little afraid he might witness something,  I told him we were ok and I fed her without anyone seeing anything. I think it was a teaching moment and he won’t ask a lady to leave the room again.

What saddens me the most when it comes to the breastfeeding battle is that it is still a battle. How on earth did something so natural become taboo? Today after this photo was posted on someone’s Facebook timeline, all hell broke lose.

a woman posted that women who breastfeed at restaurants have no manners and were not raised right. She proceeded to say that if you couldn’t find a sitter than stay home, that breastfeeding your baby while SHE was eating in the same vicinity was offensive and that we should get up and take our babies into the bathroom (again, what the hell is wrong with people). That we were as bad as people who bring their children to bars.

It was easy to figure out that she did not have kids. She admitted that no she didn’t have any but that she would take being polite any day over feeding her child in public.

I remember a long time ago a lady at work crying because her cat had died. I remember thinking, wow lady it’s just a cat-years later I felt pain like I had never experienced when our family cat passed away. Sometimes it’s best not to speak on something before you’ve lived it- lesson learned for sure. I hope this is also the case for crazy hide your tit woman.

If one day this illogical woman’s child is screaming bloody murder because she is starving ( in some unideal place) and she looks around the room and is worried about the individuals in that room more than the life that she created, than I firmly believe she has issues.

There isn’t a place in this world or a person who I would be worried about offending if and when my baby girl needs to eat.

I applaud the women who have made the decision to breastfeed! Good for you, I know first hand that you literally can’t just go spend hours doing anything because you either have to feed your child, or find a suitable place to pump.

Breastfeeding moms, I totally get it. I appreciate your hard work and commend you for sticking with it! Happy National Breastfeeding Week!

And to those that we offend, maybe you should be offended by the women who flash their boobs for Mardi Gras beads, or to get some guys attention-and if given the choice would you want your daughter showing her boob to feed her child or…doing something strange for a little bit of change?!

Maybe you should be offended by the parents who do harmful things to their children instead of the parents who are trying to do something beneficial. More importantly I wrote this blog boobs out and baby on my lap! Yeah I said it.

Filed under mommyhood baby babies breastfeeding boobs