Mommy Letters to Baby!

I loved you before I knew you!

Posts tagged mommyhood

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BOOBS! What’s the BIG Deal?

In honor of national breastfeeding week, I thought I would share some thoughts on breastfeeding. 

Doing what’s best for my baby is my priority despite the ridiculousness I have encountered…I will share some of that with you now.

Since day one I have been very on top of my needs for breastfeeding. I let my employer know what I needed and the company has been fantastic. One particular employee, however, on more than one occasion failed to realize the importance of my pumping schedule and asked me to hurry up and be back by a certain time. HE also told me to pump in a bathroom once.

Let me tell you that my boobs work on their own time, I can’t just tell them to hurry up, it does not work that way. More importantly, how about I prepare your lunch in the bathroom, I bet you might be a little hesitant to eat it…That’s unsanitary so NO I will not make my baby’s lunch in there either.

Once while feeding the baby, I had a guy stare at me the entire time, and YES I was covered up. I finally called to Slim because it was just weird. I’m not sure why he couldn’t look away, nothing was showing and I’m sure it’s no mystery why I have a baby covered up like that.

My own brother recently asked me if I wanted to go into a different room to feed the baby. In his defense, he wasn’t really sure how it worked and was trying to be helpful. I think he was a little afraid he might witness something,  I told him we were ok and I fed her without anyone seeing anything. I think it was a teaching moment and he won’t ask a lady to leave the room again.

What saddens me the most when it comes to the breastfeeding battle is that it is still a battle. How on earth did something so natural become taboo? Today after this photo was posted on someone’s Facebook timeline, all hell broke lose.

a woman posted that women who breastfeed at restaurants have no manners and were not raised right. She proceeded to say that if you couldn’t find a sitter than stay home, that breastfeeding your baby while SHE was eating in the same vicinity was offensive and that we should get up and take our babies into the bathroom (again, what the hell is wrong with people). That we were as bad as people who bring their children to bars.

It was easy to figure out that she did not have kids. She admitted that no she didn’t have any but that she would take being polite any day over feeding her child in public.

I remember a long time ago a lady at work crying because her cat had died. I remember thinking, wow lady it’s just a cat-years later I felt pain like I had never experienced when our family cat passed away. Sometimes it’s best not to speak on something before you’ve lived it- lesson learned for sure. I hope this is also the case for crazy hide your tit woman.

If one day this illogical woman’s child is screaming bloody murder because she is starving ( in some unideal place) and she looks around the room and is worried about the individuals in that room more than the life that she created, than I firmly believe she has issues.

There isn’t a place in this world or a person who I would be worried about offending if and when my baby girl needs to eat.

I applaud the women who have made the decision to breastfeed! Good for you, I know first hand that you literally can’t just go spend hours doing anything because you either have to feed your child, or find a suitable place to pump.

Breastfeeding moms, I totally get it. I appreciate your hard work and commend you for sticking with it! Happy National Breastfeeding Week!

And to those that we offend, maybe you should be offended by the women who flash their boobs for Mardi Gras beads, or to get some guys attention-and if given the choice would you want your daughter showing her boob to feed her child or…doing something strange for a little bit of change?!

Maybe you should be offended by the parents who do harmful things to their children instead of the parents who are trying to do something beneficial. More importantly I wrote this blog boobs out and baby on my lap! Yeah I said it.

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Move over Beyonce! My baby is a singer.

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Crying it Out!

I have raised a baby girl for seven months and honestly, I have very little to complain about-she is happy all the time! The only time she cries is when she needs to be fed or changed and she gets a little fussy now that she’s teething- but that’s to be expected.

Although this may seem ideal, there is a downfall to having an immensely happy child-when they cry, it sets you into panic mode because you really aren’t used to it.

Tonight I had to suck it up and let baby MJ cry. I didn’t want to, but I had to. She isn’t sleeping through the night and I believe it has a lot to do with the fact that me and Slimmy have been suckers and have let her take over our bed and I continue to feed her when she wakes up through the night.

After numerous conversations, a whole lot of googling and research, I finally made the decision to let her cry it out. Easier said than done for sure. We are trying to get a routine together, we are failing miserably. The kid does not want to go to bed anywhere near early-night owl like her daddy.

So today she didn’t really nap that much at all so I was very hopeful, but 7pm rolled around and she wasn’t tired at all. I fed her, laid her down, played lullaby music-NOTHING. For a little bit she seemed content just laying there, and then all hell broke loose.

She screamed bloody murder, I repeatedly told myself she’s ok. Her diaper is clean, she is not hungry, she just wants to cuddle, stay strong. For someone so little man can she really wail. I questioned everything. Is this ok? Am I doing the right thing? Will she hate me tomorrow?

I held out though, a few tears of my own shed, and suddenly the room was silent. She’s sleep, IN HER OWN BED! I am not gonna lie, I feel like I should check her every 5 minutes. I am not even sure I will be able to fall asleep now and let me tell you this baby monitor is up so loud, but mission accomplished.

Now what?! Do we do this every night? Do I have to let her cry in order for her to fall asleep and stay sleep? What happens when she wakes up tonight? Do I get her, let her cry again? I am not sure I can do that.

HELP?! I should be enjoying this grown up time now that baby girl is knocked out, instead I am questioning tonights turn of events and my parenting techniques. I will have to just breathe it out. It’s only day one, God I hope it gets easier, until it does though-I will keep my ear glued to this baby monitor.

Filed under mommyhood baby sleepingbaby babygirl parents

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Why Do You Need a License to Drive, But Anyone Can Have a Baby?

When you have a child, you should understand the opportunity that you hold in your hands!

I have never really considered myself a judgemental person. Honestly what others choose to do has no affect on how I live my life so why should anyone’s choices be of concern to me…and then I had a baby.

I am fully aware that I will not do everything right as a parent. I am a firm believer in trial and error and let me tell you that that can lead to some interesting situations, but lately I have witnessed some huge parenting flaws and if it makes me judgemental for pointing them out, than so be it.

How on earth are you as a parent, driving around on a highway with your baby bouncing around in the back. What logical reason is your child not strapped into a car seat? What if the unthinkable happens and your child becomes a projectile object?

Why exactly is your baby, who can’t even be one yet, eating chips and drinking pop? Now I am no doctor, but I can tell you that this is not ok and quite detrimental to the health of your child.

Where are you at?!?! How is it that I stumbled into your 3 year old daughter sitting halfway off the curb and halfway into the street?  We had a ten minute conversation. I learned her name, how old she was, and where she lived. What I never learned was where you were. It really should be easy to figure out how this situation could have gone terribly wrong. She could have been hit by a car, I could have been a kidnapper or pedophile…the possibilities are endless.

Why do you look fresh to death and your child looks as if he/she hasn’t been bathed for days? Looking good is awesome, who doesn’t want to be attractive and feel good? But if wearing name brand clothes and getting your nails and hair done, or buying that new pair of shoes means that baby girl will be neglected, maybe you need to make better choices. No it is not ok to let her wear the same dirty sponge bob t-shirt for 3 days and leave her hair looking like a comb hasn’t touched it in a month. You are failing big time.

I’m sorry, but with all this open space, why is it that you must smoke with your kids in your car and even worse with the windows up?! By all means smoke! Smoke until your lungs turn black, that is your choice and do what makes you happy, but how dare you do that to your baby?! When your child winds up with asthma or some other horrible breathing disorder, yes you will be to blame, simple!

Every parent is allowed to get frustrated, the job is not easy and kids will test you, but screaming at your child, calling your child names and telling your child they are worthless, only makes you look terrible. I can only imagine what goes on at home, if this happens in public.

I am not going to do everything right, I am fully aware of it, but I am certainly ALWAYS keeping her best interest at heart. I have accepted that I will make mistakes. I am learning daily, but sometimes I look around at my fellow parents and I am blown away that everyone is allowed to procreate.

Children will rise to expectations, but they will also fall to expectations, so why on earth are you not raising the bar?

Filed under mommyhood babies baby parenting

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I have been a mom for six months now, wow does time fly! Over the past six months, I have learned a lot about myself and life in general. I am positive that parenting is different for everyone, but I have gained some personal knowledge and I think I am coming into my parenting style quite nicely. 

The past six months have taught me…

  • I would rather my arm fall off from a lack of blood flow than risk moving it and having my daughter wake up.
  • You know you’ve grown up when you can’t fathom Kim Kardashian being a role model for anyone.
  • Being tired is never an excuse, because being tired is the equivalent of being a parent- thus a way of life that cannot be used as a daily excuse. 
  • The only way to ever be on time is to leave an hour early, if something unexpected can happen, it will.
  • People without kids will NEVER understand that it never gets old to show pictures of your baby, to talk about your baby, to be obsessed with all things baby, until they have their own of course. 
  • The entire theme song to Little Einsteins, and man does that rocket ship look cool.
  • Most things you thought you wouldn’t do as a parent, you probably will at some point.
  • It’s ok to get frustrated.
  • You will quickly grow out of your gag reflex, because getting peed, pooped, or vomited on has become a common occurrence.
  • Some of your friends will disappear.
  • Everyone has advice, you don’t have to take it all or any of it for that matter…She is YOUR child.
  • Her smile can cure anything.
  • When your marriage is strong, when you two are in sync, everything is much better.
  • Her daddy is a total sucker for her so you will probably have to be the enforcer.
  • MOST IMPORTANTLY- I am a mom first! You can’t make me feel bad for whipping a boob out and feeding my child, I use a receiving blanket for your sake, not mine. You can’t make me feel bad because I need to have a snack during a work meeting, if I don’t eat, I don’t produce milk-simple. You can’t make me feel bad for showing up late or leaving early at your shindig, if she needs me, she trumps whatever you got going on…I never just leave because! You can’t make me feel bad for anything! Sure you can try, but it won’t work. I AM A MOM FIRST! I won’t let her down, I won’t fail her, and I won’t feel bad for being dedicated to this. 

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Once I had this tiny little baby. She’s not so tiny anymore, it’s pretty incredible how much they change! Love you sweet girl

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I am in love with this little human! Simply and truly in love! Yes I think I have the most beautiful baby in the world because EVERY parent has the right to! She makes me laugh! After a hard day at work, or stressful encounter…pretty much anytime, her smile literally lights up my world and melts my heart! I am so glad God gave her to me! YEP, I MADE THAT!!!!!

I am in love with this little human! Simply and truly in love! Yes I think I have the most beautiful baby in the world because EVERY parent has the right to! She makes me laugh! After a hard day at work, or stressful encounter…pretty much anytime, her smile literally lights up my world and melts my heart! I am so glad God gave her to me! YEP, I MADE THAT!!!!!

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Bringing Sexy Back…After Baby


If sexy is a state of mind, then I definitely don’t have a grasp on my sexy mind frame yet. One would think I would give myself some slack considering four months ago, I gave birth to a human being that I grew.

Do you know what growing a human being entails?! Swollen ankles, vomiting, body parts stretching to an unimaginable degree, carpal tunnel syndrome, pretty much all things NOT sexy.

I have this idea of what I am supposed to look and feel like, I don’t look or feel like any of that.

Yes, I would like to wear heels on a regular basis, because that is sexy, but unfortunately my feet are no longer a size 7 and I can barely squeeze my feet into the shoes I own.

I’ve these amazing new boobs, but they are so much bigger than the old set so instead of wanting to flaunt them like crazy, I am always on a mission to make sure they are covered up or at least not hanging out.

Not to mention the amount of pressure I feel in my back as a result of my new assets. OH and did I mention, they no longer belong to me, they belong to baby MJ and…SOMETIMES they leak, I know, NOT SEXY!

I’m cheap and have high hopes so I refuse to buy clothes that fit this body which means I am stuck wearing clothes that are either too big, or a little too small…NOT sexy!

Bringing Sexy back after baby is not easy. I’m exhausted constantly so working out doesn’t even seem like a smart idea not to mention there isn’t enough time in my day. Between work, baby and the mandatory nap I now take to keep me sane, working out seems like a far off dream.

The truth of the matter is I don’t want to get back to exactly where I was, I am kind of digging my new momma curves, but everything definitely needs to be tightened up-mostly I just want to feel better.

All I know is, Sexy will come eventually, but I have to put in the work…I refuse to have a 5 year old, still trying to use the excuse that I just had a baby LOL.

Filed under mommyhood body after baby bringing sexy back after baby body pregnancy weight

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I am back at work, I am in 4 weddings, I’ve had 3 family members die in the past month, I am fighting off postpartum depression setbacks, and on top of that I still have to be a mom and a wife.

Yes this is what my current plate looks like.

No it is not easy and quite honestly I think it is wearing on me physically and emotionally. I am exhausted, I lost my voice for a week and I am all cried out.

Parenthood is a balancing act! The good news is, that I realize it is a balancing act, the bad news is I have yet to discover how to do that.

Finding time is my goal. Enough time for Baby MJ, enough time For Slimmy…and enough time for me!

and here is what I discovered…I have got to start saying NO! I have no time because I never tell anybody no. I go to events when I am sick, I give rides when I am exhausted. It’s a horrible habit. I am the Queen of saying yes to things despite the fact that I know I simply cannot do it.

So I am officially adding to my vocabulary the TRUTH! No, no I can’t. I’m sorry I am busy, I’m sorry but I just want to hang with my family today, No! I am exhausted, I have a baby. I don’t have time, Sorry but I can’t. No! No! No!

I have to take care of number 1 or I won’t be able to take care of my family and I have not been doing a very good job of that.

Today I am putting me first, because when I am sick, sad, exhausted, when I am not myself…my household does not function as smoothly as I need it to.

SO I love you, but NO I can’t for awhile!

Filed under mommyhood balance postpartum issues marriage